N turned 45 today (happy birthday, baby!).

I remember going to N’s 20th birthday party. And eating mixture, murukkus, and mysore pak (after all, the Grand Sweets HQ was only a stone’s throw from his place). I remember having to leave the party early, and him coming to drop me off at the bus stop. I was so pleasantly surprised that he would choose to walk with me to my bus rather than continue to play host to the others that stayed late.  Hmmm… did he already have ideas back then? 😉

10 years back, for N’s 35th birthday, five year old little N and two year old little A (awww, my teeny tiny babies!!) did handprints on a plate at our local pottery place.  Inspiration struck last month when the chickis were idling away during spring break, and we went for an encore session at the same pottery place.

Will 25 year old little N and 22 year old little A come back together to do this yet again in 2028? Well. Time will tell. I will be v. disturbed, though, if their hands are much bigger than they are now. 😉

My MIL has always been one of the first to call to wish us for special occasions. With the time difference between India and NJ, I could almost picture her in the late afternoon (there) waiting impatiently by the phone for it to turn a decent hour here. And deciding by 6:30 am that enough was enough, people should be up by that late hour and then promptly calling us. As N and I were having our coffee this morning, I almost said, “why don’t you call mom first today before she calls?”. And then bit my lip. N told me later that he kept half-expecting mom’s call this morning too. I feel so sad for him. I know that even more than the initial crushing grief, it is in the small day to day moments and on special occasions that the intensity of loss really hits home hard.

N and I canceled our separate work lunch meetings, and stole an hour in the middle of the day to go get lunch together. Mithaas did not disappoint. Even though we are not in a celebrating mood right now, I am glad that we made the time to do a little special something to mark N’s birthday. But the evening is still young. I think I am going to churn out a semiya payasam to surprise N when he gets back from work, and eke out the birthday celebrations a little bit more. 🙂


2 thoughts on “45

  1. Happy Birthday to N.
    Please wish him from me.
    Hugs to both of you on the bereavement. Grief can hit at the most unexpected times.

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